Pencil to Paper

The Daily Life of a Compulsive Writer

RaptureWatch – 11:00 AM May 21, 2011

Filed under: In the News,Religion — katblogger @ 10:58 AM
Tags: ,

It’s still a normal day. At about 10:06 I heard a weird clicking, scraping noise and thought, pehaps I’m hearing the pincers of a ravening bug demon sent to drag me into hell.

It was a squirrel. Today is not shaping into something particularly exciting.

If you haven’t heard, a group of non-Christians came up with a great idea – After the Rapture Pet service. They’re offering to take care of the pets of Raptured Christians. The best part is, people are actually taking them up on it. Which made me think that there’s money in a whole line of Rapture-related products. After the Rapture lawn care. Child care, if your children are godless heathens. Hallmark could make a killing with Rapture themed cards. ‘Happy Judgement Day. I’ll be thinking of you when the earth is destroyed in five months’. Or even, ‘Sorry I couldn’t come to your birthday. I’m in heaven.’ They could make thousands.

Moving on, let’s look at the next few sections of Revelation.

2: An angel at Ephesus is getting serious with his threats. He warns, “Repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you repent.” I’m trembling. Not the lampstand!

Jesus will make war on people with the sword in his mouth. I’m trying to imagine how one would attack people with a sword in one’s mouth. I can’t imagine it would be easy.

3: Seven spirits are now added to the list of sevens. Was this the only number John knew?

“you are neither cold nor hot. I wish that you were either cold or hot. So, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I am about to spit you out of my mouth”. Creepiest extended metaphor ever. 

See you next hour for more chapters of fun!


One Response to “RaptureWatch – 11:00 AM”

  1. ” I’m trying to imagine how one would attack people with a sword in one’s mouth. I can’t imagine it would be easy.”


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